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Why your manager always engaged in Meetings?

Meetings: Where minutes are kept and hours are lost.

Every techie has asked this question – why am I put in so many unnecessary meetings by my manager?
Here is the answer: it is the only visible engagement of the manager.

Didn’t get it? What is a software professionals’ output? His code. The testers’ output? His test report. The leads’ output? The product. Everbody, including the canteen chef, has an output. And the manager? What is he doing? How does he spend his time (at least as visible to others)? Well, he calls for meetings. He has nothing else to do! Other than reports and presentations, but others don’t see it. And probably of little value anyway. Meetings keeps him engaged. Otherwise, his office life is a big void. Worse, the others see it.

[In reality, the better managers does have an unenviable task of balancing the needs of the clients (want more in less time|money) and his own subordinates (will do less with more time|money). But then, when was the last time you worked under a ‘better manager’?]

Tips for techies to let others avoid calling you:

  • Do not respond to meeting invitations. Do not go unless someone calls.
  • Take a notebook along. Draw big circles in it during the meeting. Make sure everyone sees it.
  • Chew gum, making “chwya-chwya” sound. It disturbs more people than you think.
  • Look and let your eyes follow those going outside your meeting room. Do this even when you are speaking. Everyone will look at what you are looking. Entire team gets distracted. Success!
Nothing about modern IT management is complete without dear Dilbert. Check it out yourselves!
Contributed by NAG. WARNING: The tips are performed by experts. Trying to imitate them may cost your job!
       

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10 comments

  1. Sub standard article. Poor!!
    Comparing your manager to other is bad. You can say it as “My Manager”.

  2. Anish,

    Understood your frustration. 🙂

  3. hahaha…this is very true…

  4. I do not see a “Report this article” link I fear 🙂

    This post must be removed from this blog as it misleads techies.

    >> Contributed by NAG. WARNING: The tips are performed by experts. Trying to imitate them may cost your job!

    experts? There are real managers. Fake managers will not last long. Analyze your managers.

  5. Meetings are needed for a process oriented company. It is difficult micro-monitor a company with at least 100 employees. Most of the IT people would sit idle if somebody did not ask “which task you are doing” or “remember our deadline”

  6. Thats perfectly true Praveen. But articles like this would make us think.

  7. “Any resemblance between the characters and persons living or dead is Purely Coincidental”

    Please include the above sentence also in your article … 🙂

  8. Thats why Managers are always Managers and workers are always workers…

    Infact, u shud also ask Achuthandan, Manmohan Singh and even Barack Obama..what do they do? other than sitting in their office and hosting meetings? not working at all????

    This is all over the world sir..employees barking on the ‘fact’ that his/her manager does not know a thing..but how come he is my manager?

    So please understand that there is something called ‘Leadership”.
    Managers who will take responsibility for your stupidity and will also cut your check.

    It is imperative that a company shud nourish talents to become better managers and world class leaders for its own good.

    But at the same time meetings should not be just a waste of time.

  9. haha…look how some got enraged at what is just a humor article…
    i guess these guys wud want dilbert banned.

  10. Managers are needed for every organization,and under the leadership of the manager or leader the company will survive. that is a fact. but things are taking a turn when some people come to the position of manager – who is not fit for that position.

    for example, in my previous company, we hired a manager for one of our IT projects, but that manager came from Military. He does’nt know anything about the IT industry and how the work culture and how the relationship between the hirearchy etc.. I think IT company having the most liberal form of hirearchy, where everyone is almost equal, but doing different jobs.

    That manager came to the scene in a fine day, and he started commanding and issuing memos for even silly problems, he got tensed for tiny matters and he made the entire team in trouble.

    There are managers who knows how to manage and do their job, and other hand some managers are not fit for the position and they are an overhead for the workers and the company.

    There is a fact in that. so we can’t simply ignore it.